missing the groom

thoughts of him bothering me again today.. very badly.. no matter how much i wanted to push it way, it keep coming.. really hard to survive a break up.. especially the other one left to marry someone else.. lots of thoughts.. too hurt to spell everything here..

i was in kampung for 2 days.. one of my closest cousin got married today.. morning was the nikah followed by sanding 1 hour later.. really organized kenduri and i really tabik all the orang kampung that were helping out.. the nikah was really touchy.. still playing in the back of my mind.. there was a moment, after the ijabkabul, the groom put his palms on the bride's head and the bride's is nodding willlingly.. he was reading an oath to take care of her, to be with her forever.. makes me realize, marriage is a holy thing.. it's not just legal sex.. we dont only see bonding between the bride and groom, but also families, life, problems, love..

i guess, this is a petunjuk dan hidayah..

i realize, in my heart, i really have to let him go fully and sincerely.. he's bonded with a holy marriage.. recognized by God that they belong together.. he's belong to someone else, someone else's families, life and problems..